Fire extinguished?

We see old couples with the same flame they used to have when they were married. It’s impossible to see that in our generation. Very rare it is, these days to love unconditionally and stick by one another forever. It’s not easy, we are humans after all, constantly subjected to many choices.

It is similar to shopping, some say, from the color to the fit, everything needs to compliment us; when we have used it enough and can see signs of wearing, the basic tendency is to throw it out or give it for someone else to use.

Nowadays, we tend to love people like we love things. Sad isn’t it?!

We give up as soon as it gets a little difficult. Aren’t we built for more tolerance than that.

Falling out of love is yet debatable.

One thing no one should undergo is marital rape or physical violence. There is no reason big enough that gives anyone the right to even raise a hand. It’s not enough to know your rights, demand it!

Respect and patience, according to me are the two main ingredients encapsulated in love. If you love someone you’ll love him/her despite his/her flaws and if they love you they’ll set you free and let you shine.

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Attachment!

Have you noticed that you always make excuses for the ones you love even when they are wrong or at fault? When they are around, you give them a chance to explain themselves and when they are not around, you stand by them, ridiculously making every attempt to protect them.

Why do we do so?

When we are too attached to someone, we take it upon ourselves to protect him or her, even if they have wronged. You just can’t see them in pain; you become vicariously involved. It’s okay to be supportive but don’t encourage their wrong doing. No one needs to be taught a lesson in public, it can always be done in private. There is that difference in the upbringing.

Now you’ll know if someone doesn’t love you enough.

Usually you’ll find people looking out for themselves, it’s very rare to find a friend who cares for you truly, to make excuses for you. Friendship is a whole new ball game. People have it all wrong when they think it’s the number of friends that matter but it’s actually just the quality and not the quantity.

Friendship, that allows you to be 100% yourself, that which lends a ear in times of distress, that which understands you when no one else does and motivates your future instead of discussing people or bringing each other down; that is what will pass the test of time and will last forever.

Cheers to friends, such!

Just so peace prevails..

How much is too much?

When do you know when to stop?

You are old enough and also sound enough to take your own decisions but you listen to your elders anyway because you want to respect them and also you want peace to prevail in the house.

If and only if you think that they are stopping you from being who you are, stopping you because they are not willing to give you your freedom, let me tell you that they are wrong. Learn to say no. The more you succumb to their every command, the more rules and regulations you’ll be stuffed with. Not only learn to say no, but stand up and fight for it, no matter how trivial, because it’s these trivial things that end up being the reason for bigger issues. Start small.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying, you need to go against everything they say. They even might say it keeping the best interests in mind but if even for a second you doubt that you are treated unfairly, respect yourself enough to question it; respect yourself enough to fight it.

Let me assure you that their mindset may not change immediately instead it will only make them furious. Furious that your going against their wishes and they’ll do anything in their power to get you back in control.

All your focus must be in moving forward, no matter how much you are pulled back.

Angerrr…

It’s true, that more than being angry you want to show the one who has made you angry that you are angry with them. Constantly rubbing it down their face like it would change anything. Anger is no joke, makes us say stupid things and makes us do even more stupid things.

When you cannot tolerate how a person is treating you or how a situation has gripped you completely, you want to burst out of those handcuffs and free yourself. In extreme cases maybe that is the solution but otherwise anger will not resolve anything. That’s the instinct though, to get angry, to say things you would regret later on.

But you have the power to do NOTHING, to say NOTHING, that in turn takes away their power over you, especially when you know it’s not your fault, it can be the hardest thing to do. But do it.

I have seen a lot of parenting gone wrong because they want to teach their kids a lesson and when their kids don’t fare well it instills anger in their parents, which results in unwanted arguments that might affect the kid in the long run.

Places where you have to stand up for yourself, don’t hesitate. When they don’t understand your point of view, make them understand, and even if they don’t, make sure you did your part. Someone, someday will see exactly what you see and assure you that you are not alone.

Dont react to the anger building up in you instead take it and direct it elsewhere. The challenge is, to be like a tree, able to stay calm during the storm, let it pass and it will make you stronger; react in the direction of the wind and you’ll be ripped off the ground.

If only..

Usually with us humans we decide our worth based on other people’s opinions about us. Social media can be a diaphanous tool that allows people to look into our lives and judge. Everybody is out there, me inclusive, flaunting everything we have on such platforms because we care about what people think to an extent where it becomes an addiction and the only high is getting approval, getting those likes. The downside being downcast; some of us take it personally and let it affect our chi. The insatiable need for approval is real but it’s not going to change how we look or who we are. What we think of ourselves matter because in the end if we are not happy being who we are then no matter how much you are appreciated by the world, it will never be enough.

I can say for a fact that all of us lack something, which if we possessed would have made us simply want something else. If we have this we whine about if only we had that and vice versa. Our unsatiated needs, no matter how much it is quenched, can never be fully satisfied. The ever growing fondness for materialism mitigates what is actually important. These days more than possessing anything it’s about showcasing it. Exhibiting your every move is the name of the game. Though there is nothing wrong in it, I would rather have my achievements out for the world to see, but that’s just me.

Lately I have been in this balloon myself, and when I tried blowing in too much it burst. I understand the need to be wanted, to be socially accepted, and trust me I have been there but make sure your social life is not a personal one. Balance is vital no matter what you do in life.

The digital fortress:

– Dan Brown

Every page of this book reveals unexpected substance thereby leaving us with no choice but to flip the pages with more hunger and an increased appetite for an enthralling suspense.

The characters are introduced, not all at once but only when they are of importance. The protagonist of this thriller is Susan Fletcher. The one with the beauty and the brains; works as the head of the cryptology department at the NSA.

David Becker and Susan hit it off after their first meet at the crypto, where David had come to be of assistance. He is a professor and also a foreign language specialist; the latter of which he is summoned at the NSA for.

The director of the NSA, Strathmore, and Susan share tacit respect for each other and he also thinks Susan is the best at what she does. He calls her in on a Saturday; Susan instantly knew it was an emergency as he has never done that before.

It all starts there..

If your familiar with brown’s work, you will agree that he always brings forth a theory your not quite sure if it’s true or not. One of that is the NSA’s TRANSLTR.

It is a code- breaking machine known to none outside the headquarters of NSA. Discreet it maybe but there were speculations about it, which were never admitted to. This machine is in danger of a foreign code and it’s also the first of its kind that the TRANSLTR ever comes across. Hence, uncrackable.

Strathmore and Susan give it their all trying to save the one thing which they both are fond of; that which has made tasks simpler at the crypto and the reason for peace to prevail in the nation. The TRANSLTR.

Susan slowly learns the truth. The whole truth. And also the reason why her lover is sent on a mission without her knowledge. She fights it all with everything she has got till the very end.

I’m not going to spoil it any further for you. Beware of the sudden twists in the plot. Go grab the book right now because it’s going to blow your brains off. Let me know what you think of it too.

Rights I’m born with, but robbed by society. 

So, they have started looking for alliances; you know the drill.. a family that would be a little forward they said, at least then I would be allowed to wear salwar suit after marriage, and also will be given a little freedom – after all they have to prove their echelon of being forward. That is what their definition of forward is atleast. They say if I’m privileged to get a family like that I’m truly blessed.

Isn’t my freedom mine to decide? Isn’t wearing what I want a privilege I’m born with?

To my future husband- I’m tired of compromising though I have been taught to compromise all my life.

If I would have to LIE to you for meeting a friend or colleague even late at night, I’m sorry but it’s not going to work between us.
If I have to pretend to be the sati savitri bahu(obedient wife) in front of your parents, and be whoever I want to be only when I’m out for a holiday with you, I’ll be living a lie and I’m definitely not Okay.
Don’t expect me to be cooking for you all day I wasn’t educated for that.
I wear clothes that I like, if your going to have a problem about how deep it is or short it seems, it clearly is your problem so don’t even bother to take this forward.
If you can go out for trips with your friends, I’m sure I would want that too, if you are going to fart double standards at me, that stink would perish every possibility of us.
Want to work or not it’s my choice, if you are stupid enough to make that choice for me, that will be the end of us.
I’m going to voice my opinion every time I smell hate, I don’t think I have been given a voice to be kept mute.
All I ask is treat me like a human, give me respect and I’ll bounce it back a million times, as simple as that.
I know girls who wish the same things but settle and I definitely understand why! I’m not going to let my life string dangle in someone else’s hand.